Psychotic P***y Podcast
Just two sisters discussing women’s mental and physical health. It's not only our hobby, but our careers. We want to shed light on important topics & teach people new things every episode.
Psychotic P***y Podcast
Gene Editing and Female Antiheroes
Science meets sociology in this thought-provoking episode where we tackle revolutionary genetic technology alongside persistent gender double standards in entertainment.
First, we dive into CRISPR gene editing – a medical breakthrough recently used in Japan to eliminate an extra chromosome in a Down syndrome embryo. We explore the incredible potential of this technology to address genetic conditions while wrestling with the ethical boundaries. Could targeting disease genes evolve into selecting for eye color, height, or intelligence? The specter of "designer babies" raises profound questions about equity, accessibility, and the limits of human intervention in genetics. Where do we draw the line when it comes to editing our future children?
The conversation then shifts to an equally contentious topic: why can't female characters be unlikable? Sarah Jessica Parker recently commented that female antiheroes can't exist or be liked in the same way as male antiheroes. We dissect the cultural double standard where complex, morally ambiguous men like Tony Soprano are beloved, while women who display realistic human reactions (like Skylar White from Breaking Bad) are vilified. These expectations trace back centuries, with historical and religious roots that enforced women's roles as moral centers of the household.
Throughout our discussion, we celebrate the recent wave of female-created media breaking these molds – from Fleabag to Killing Eve to unfiltered comedy specials that present women as gloriously flawed humans rather than perfect paragons. We share our honest experiences of motherhood that echo these same tensions between unrealistic expectations and messy reality.
Between the serious topics, we lighten the mood with tales of our Fourth of July celebrations (yes, even in England!) and share upcoming plans to record together when Bridget visits the States in August.
Have thoughts on CRISPR technology or female antiheroes? We'd love to hear them! Share your perspective with us on social media or leave a review.
Disclaimer: This podcast represents the opinions of Dr. Bridget Melton, MD and licensed therapist Marissa Volinsky, MS, LPC, NCC. The contents of our podcast and website should not be taken as medical advice. The contents of our podcast and website are for general informational purposes only, and are not intended to diagnose, treat, prevent, or cure any condition or disease or substitute for medical advice. Always seek the advice of your physician, mental health professional, or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition or treatment and before starting or discontinuing treatment.
If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or a crisis, please reach out immediately to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or text HOME to the Crisis Text Line at 741741. These services are free and confidential.
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Hello, welcome to Psychotic PY Podcast. It is season three, episode eight. We think Totally unsure, to be honest. It's the summer, okay, we're all a bit lackadaisical, we're having fun, we're having drinky poos. I've already had a beer today. Well, it's late here, it's 7, 18 pm, so so, um, so yeah, everyone, welcome to psychotic PY pod. And we are chatting about female antiheroes Can they exist? And, if they exist, can they be liked? And we are talking about more sciencey things like CRISPR technology and gene editing. So let's kick it off gene editing.
Speaker 1:So let's kick it off. Hello, welcome back everybody. Yeah, we went on a bit of a hiatus, sorry. I've been doing a bunch of other things for a new path therapy and off-duty mom retreat, so I've just been a bit busy. And then obviously just summertime and children and summer camps and all that fun stuff.
Speaker 2:Exactly yes, off duty. Here we go again. Shameless plug like off duty. A mom's retreat. Merce is running it. It's her first big retreat. It's her first retreat. It's gonna be absolutely epic. There's only five spots left and yeah, so everyone follow the instagram and join.
Speaker 1:Yes please also coming soon to the UK off duty a mom's retreat led by yours truly, bridget.
Speaker 2:Melton, don't hold me to it yet. We're still trying to get it off the ground. Um, but yeah, there is a chance, guys, that we are going global with off duty. I think it's coming to the UK, so stay tuned, watch this space, as they say, but when it's up and running, you will know. Don't worry, you'll be blasted. So, yeah, off duty might be going across the pond, so that's super exciting Yay, all right, kick off our topic bridge pick one of the two.
Speaker 2:Okay, let's start with the heavy stuff so that people stay a bit focused, and then we we'll get into the cray-cray. Okay, so this is not super new, but it is newer as of 2025 that it's actually happening. But this has been in the works for a while, so we're going to talk about it and you're probably like yeah, yeah, I've heard of that, but usually it's unethical, so it hasn't been done. So CRISPR technology is basically some gene editing and in Japan, in February 2025, they successfully had an embryo that they use CRISPR technology on and they targeted the unwanted chromosome on an embryo that had trisomy 21. Trisomy 21 means a third accidental copy of gene 21, the 21st chromosome sorry, and that leads to Down syndrome. So approximately one in 700 live births in the US will have trisomy 21. So it's not I wouldn't say it's common, but it's definitely not uncommon.
Speaker 2:There are some Nordic countries who have basically all but eliminated it, not because of crisper technology, but whenever they offer um women um gene testing when they're pregnant and they recommend. They don't recommend, but they do say, like you can terminate this pregnancy if you have trisomy 29 or any of the trisomies, really, because um down syndrome is very livable and that's fine. Um, although there are very negative health consequences for your heart, lungs, et cetera, arthritis. So just because you're like, hey, I have a cousin with down syndrome. He's absolutely fine. It is very much a spectrum and that's why it's a syndrome.
Speaker 2:So syndromes mean that you can have some all or none of these certain things, but you will have obviously three copies of chromosome 21. But you will have obviously three copies of chromosome 21. So some are really plagued by it and it really negatively affects their heart health and they don't live very pleasant lives. But some people are absolutely fine and are a great time. So in Nordic countries they have been saying you know, if you want to terminate, do it. And they did get a very high acceptance rate of that procedure and that's why they've basically eliminated trisomy 21 decades ago. Wow, yeah.
Speaker 2:Very interesting. So CRISPR technology is, if you're, you know, doing IVF basically if you have the embryo outside of the womb, then you can use this targeted gene therapy treatment. It is really a touchy topic, though, because some people think it's unethical, because they say it's, you shouldn't do this. Obviously, this is a massive fallacy, but they use slippery slope mindset where they say, well, if you can do that, then you can, you know, choose a baby with blue eyes. You know where do we draw the line, kind of thing, although that is an argumentative fallacy. You can't just say, because we do this, then automatically we're going to do that. Obviously, it's very different. Choosing your child's eye color is very different than not wanting to have a child who's plagued with illness.
Speaker 1:But also I would say, like there, if they were, you know, so concerned with you going in and choosing eye color, like why does eye color doesn't hurt anybody, you know what I mean?
Speaker 2:yes, but then you're getting in the whole designer babies thing and you might choose height athleticism, and then we would actually have like a massive wealth gap, um, wealthy people choosing intelligent, tall athletic um babies and obviously people who can't afford that just having you know us, they're normal kids, um, and then you would actually have like a massive. I think you'd have like a class war probably um.
Speaker 1:okay, yeah, I see that um, but yeah, I I mean I don't know if you and ted have discussed, like when you get tested and it comes up with Down syndrome, what you would do, but John and I absolutely have um and I think for me it came down to. I have worked my internships, um as a therapist in um facilities where, like you know, they're pretty much like government run, they're really run down and they go there for like adult daycare pretty much, and they have different groups all day and they get transported there, transported back, and I just I just saw how they lived and what happens after, like their parents die but they still need like full-time care and I just couldn't do, I didn't want to leave this earth knowing that my child wasn't cared for by me or could take care of themselves. So that's why John and I made the decision that you know, if Evelyn and Jack had been, you know, positive for Down syndrome, we would have definitely done the abortion.
Speaker 2:Yeah, ted, and I have talked about it and I would say I'm actually I surprised myself. I was kind of more of the softy where I completely agree with you, where I was like it would destroy me knowing that like I can't guarantee that my child will have the best life that I would provide for them. Because when you are caring for a sick child again, even if they're very, even if they have a driver's license and a job, they still have Down syndrome, they still have certain needs and I would be just really like I would be terrified knowing like I'm probably going to die before my child and I don't know in what state they will be left.
Speaker 1:Right. Also, I feel like they are vulnerable to the world because at least anyone that I, either in internship or in real life, has crossed with, they have this sort of like innocence to them, like they're very sweet, and that unfortunately makes them a target, like people will take advantage of that and that really just does not sit well with me.
Speaker 2:Um yeah, it's. It's such a tough topic, which is why I guess CRISPR is amazing, because it actually removes that um decision. They're saying we could still keep the embryo. We're just doing gene therapy, which is amazing. I think if we use CRISPR for good and I'm saying good, I know that's a subjective term but if we use it for that and for curing diseases only, that's amazing. I truly do not believe we should do. Quote unquote designer babies. I agree with that.
Speaker 1:And I truly honestly I hope that that is the case. People use this for good, but you know, my pessimistic self knows that there's people out there who always abuse the good that we create. So I'm hoping you know those people don't start popping up.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's, it is. It was for a very long time. Even research with this stuff was illegal outside of china, so most research comes from china with this, because they were like, yeah, we don't care, like the, the research code of ethics is a bit lower there, they're a bit more experimental and they let you play with more, whereas, um, in the us and canada they were like it. No. However, as we know, things change over time, so I would not be surprised if now japan's done it, china's been doing it.
Speaker 2:If other countries, western countries, are like well, they're doing it, I guess we can, and that's who I don't trust. Is it like in the hands of mainstream? Because people will push an agenda and be like well, I want to make sure that my kid is the smartest and they get my husband's height and it's such, you know, and that's, it's such an unfair leg up advantage yeah, especially because money talks and I feel like, even if you're not seeing what happens behind the scenes, someone is having a payday, someone is saying yes to something that's unethical because they're getting a big payout yeah, exactly yeah, um, and that does worry me, but it is very interesting scientifically to know that we are so far advanced that we can.
Speaker 2:I mean, guys, these are microscopic chromosomes on a microscopic embryo that we are targeting and repairing. That is amazing. And also, the treated cells showed better survival rates in certain tests, indicating that the excess genetic burden was successfully relieved. It's just amazing, that's super. Oh, that's awesome, that's great. So, yeah, just kind of a cool thing to talk about and I hope yeah, like I said, I hope we use it for good. I know good is like a loaded term, but you know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we know Wink, wink.
Speaker 2:But let us know what you guys think, because I think it's such a touchy topic and people really feel especially if you have family members with certain diseases, I think, because it's very hard to like disconnect from that and you're like I can't imagine like my cousin or my sister or whatever, not being here Totally. And, once again, I think that should always be your choice, right, right, I'm definitely not of the opinion that we should automatically terminate. I think it should definitely be your choice because it is your care burden and it's your baby to love.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. It should be the parents choice. 100 percent, that's. It's amazing, though, for someone who may not have, like they know, financially they cannot take care of someone with down syndrome for the rest of their life, but they like, maybe what if they've been struggling for years and this is the only baby they could have conceived? They don't want to give it up, and now this is an an option. That's a nice option.
Speaker 2:Especially if you are doing IVF, you might feel like, oh great, like we just got only one or two embryos and we can't even use that one. And now you're like actually we might be able to, which is, I mean, what a relief financially to not have to go through an entire round of IVF again. Absolutely. So let us know what you guys think.
Speaker 1:Yes, please, next topic. Oh wait, let's do a little pause in between topic. We just are so excited that you guys, I'm sure, had a great 4th of July. So tell us, kind of, bridget, you go'd you do you, little traitor, she's a treason party, a loyalist no, I had.
Speaker 2:We had people over.
Speaker 2:We did a fourth of July barbecue. It was a Friday, you know, you guys know, um, so we had a gorgeous fourth of July a little barbecue. It was so funny, the weather was amazing, and then Ted went out to grill so we had people over. It's fine, it's daytime, like we went shopping. We hung out with theo by the time. It was actually because obviously people had work here so people couldn't come over until after work, so we weren't eating dinner till like seven maybe.
Speaker 2:Um, ted went out to grill and it, just out of nowhere, dark clouds rolled in and it started raining on him and he, he was out there grilling. He was so annoyed, it was like cold wind and we were like what the hell? It was like sunny and 75 all day, like truly came out of nowhere. And then he came in burgers and dogs, put them on the kitchen counter. I was like okay, that's it. Like if you want anything else, it's going in the oven. Like sorry, and yeah, um, yeah, but we had a great barbecue. We had to eat inside, which kind of sucked, but that's fine. Um, we had a huge case of bud. So everyone was like you got to drink American beer. I made sure we listened to country music the whole night. Um, I know Ted tried to control the music at the end and I was like um excuse me, nope, it was like god, save the my day um.
Speaker 2:So yeah, it was actually like just a typical like fourth of july barbecue. I just kept saying like the only difference is usually you start this at like one like and you're there all day. I was like I don't know how I used to do it. It was my best friend, shannon shout out, shannon Shimrock used to host the annual fourth of j July barbecue and you would literally be there all day like drinking games in and out of the pool and then like we would sleep over at her house, like I'd be like where did that stamina come? Like I could not do that now. And also the thing about like 4th of July is like if you go to someone's house, you're eating like lunch and dinner there, like you're there all day. So I was like guys, you got to get here quicker, come on, I know you've worked, but like fucking, get here these people are like.
Speaker 1:Sure we'll celebrate your holiday where you left our country and, like, threw our team to the harbor. Well, the weather did, the country made sure it knew. You knew that it was mad, I couldn't believe it.
Speaker 2:We were saying like, what a gorgeous day it is, and then I was like, oh my god, what the fuck is this?
Speaker 1:so funny. Just want to let you know that that storm did not roll in in america, I know we, we had a great time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, what did you guys do? Oh, I know what you did.
Speaker 1:Tell everyone what you did uh, we went to great wolf lodge because my son is born on the fourth of july, so we had this pre-planned birthday um weekend. He was so excited. But my god, like so. I'm a very strict parent when it comes to schedules and bedtime, so we decided to just be like crazy. I have learned a lesson I will never be crazy again, anyway okay, keep going, keep going, are you?
Speaker 1:gonna say though, okay, so I just want to give you this little tidbit. So this is the first time my kids have actually stayed up for the fireworks together, because they're either too young or my oldest has always been afraid of the noise and like everything. So we let them stay up late and I just want to give you a how late, okay. So you're like 9, 30, 10 oh, wow, that's late for them.
Speaker 1:Wow, they would actually be exhausted, yeah um, yeah, evelyn fell asleep a few times waiting for the fireworks anyway. But when they came on, your crazy psycho niece, she's in, he's in the field. Right, she's in the field, she's going like this. They start going off. She kicks her leg up every time I'll go off and goes boom, boom. I turn over to look at jackie, your sweet little nephew. He goes. Mom, there's a lot of smoke over there. Is that fire truck moving? Is that supposed to be over there like that? And they're just, they're so opposite. I was cracking up. I was like john, look at your kids, they're further from she like wants to push the button.
Speaker 2:She wants him to go off. She did. She's so funny. I was cracking up, okay, so the fireworks and the balloon drop in my head. I was like this is a place for kids. So I kind of giggled to myself and I was like LOL, it's probably like 6 pm there and they're like yay, but it wasn't.
Speaker 1:No, the balloon drop was 9.45. Oh my God, I'm so impressed with your kids. Please don't be. I paid for it the next day with tantrums.
Speaker 1:I was like this is why we're on a schedule, Because my kids I swear you know them like they can be annoying sometimes, like normal kids are, but like they're they don't have full-blown. When I tell you, evelyn is still leveling out because since we kept her up, even until now, she's had like a minimum of four kids. Oh my god. But she had a plate of bacon. She should have been happy. Uh, as she's told my husband, you were the king.
Speaker 2:I know, I told ted that and I was like how funny is that? Because to her obviously it just means like you're not the king of me, you're the king of nothing.
Speaker 1:But to an adult that is like a cutting insult john had to turn his head because he he wanted to stay mad at her, but he was like that was so funny, good insult jesus. Right, I'm Jesus. I couldn't even think of that. I'm an adult.
Speaker 2:God she's intense Savage.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, she is. And she's on this weird kick where she wants to say Viking, but she goes around and it sounds like fucking. So we're in public and she's like fucking, fucking. And I'm like please stop, please, stop, please, oh okay. I always have to correct her. I'm like you mean like, so the moms can hear me. I'm like you mean Viking, viking.
Speaker 2:Oh, my God, that's funny. Well, they looked adorable. I was so jealous. I will say guys, great Wolf Lodge, I don't know if you've been in my head. I was like, oh, a bunch of kids pools. It's going to smell like piss. It looks so nice bunch of kids pools.
Speaker 1:It's gonna smell like piss. It looks so nice. They have adult areas too where kids can't go, so you don't have to worry about like kid germs and like peeing and so like. For, like, a certain area, the pool and hot tub were adults only for people who go there without kids or maybe like have a grandma with their kids, you know my god nice yeah, yeah, I thought it was.
Speaker 1:It really was so interactive for the kids. It was so nice, although I missed. What they need to do is do what cruises do, where you have like a drop off kid room, kids club. Now, I know there's different locations and they're all set up differently, so maybe one of the other locations has something similar, but I really wish the Poconos did, because I I could have used some me and John time Not going to lie.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean I'm not there yet, cause kids clubs usually start at like a toddler age, so, like any place I've looked up cause Ted and I are trying to go away, like it's, it's like you know, from age two and I'm like I can't even, like I would love that, but I can't visualize it yet.
Speaker 1:Go on a cruise Cruise starts at six months up and they and they actually give you a phone so you can call if you're like mommy nervous. They give you check-ins and they do nap time for you, they change diaper, they feed bottles Shit guys.
Speaker 2:She's going on a cruise, ted's booking a cruise. But yeah, I hope everyone had an amazing 4th of July.
Speaker 1:Yes, we hope you did, and we hope you're not like this treasonous bitch named Bridget.
Speaker 2:I know, and you know what's funny for me. Okay, I'm apparently like the loyalist. Guess what? I'm going to another 4th of July thing, a delayed 4th of July. Someone's hosting July 12th, so I'm doubling up, guys. How many of you in America are doubling it up?
Speaker 1:Just to beat you, I'm going to have another one this weekend, absolutely.
Speaker 2:I, I'm going to have another one this weekend, Absolutely. I'm going to an official belated 4th of July party on July 12th and I'm this guy I don't know why he's asked me like four times Are you sure you're coming? Or I was like yeah, I'll be there, and Ted was like maybe you're the token American, and he's really nervous. And I'm like wait, wait, is he not?
Speaker 1:No, no, no.
Speaker 2:He's English. He's English, but I think he's throwing it because he has his uncle, who lives in the States, who might be visiting.
Speaker 1:Oh, so like instead of having a pig roast, they're having a Bridget roast.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, that would suck, I think listeners. I think he might be sneaky proposing or something and that's why he no, but I want to make. I think that's why he's like, oh, I just want to make sure you're coming. Like I think that's why he's like, oh, I just want to make sure you're coming.
Speaker 1:I think in his head he wants RSVPs basically and I'm like I told you I'm coming, we'll see it's more plausible that you're like it's going to be a big American roast.
Speaker 2:That would really be funny, but also suck for me.
Speaker 1:I hope Ted goes in hard too.
Speaker 2:I hope he's like yeah, give it to her. Guys, I'm a cancerian queen, I'm very sensitive. I will go home and cry she won't show it.
Speaker 1:I was going to say she'll cry alone in the shower.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I'll be like that's so funny, and then I'll go home and be like dad.
Speaker 1:Is this true? I love that about you. I'll tell you guys. I'll tell you Actually, can Ted film it? If this happens, I want video evidence for our podcast, the roast of bridget.
Speaker 2:Oh, that was you know what I'm bringing? An american flag sheet cake.
Speaker 1:I don't deserve this you gotta show real gaudy, like that american cowgirl hat.
Speaker 2:Yeah like cut off in a red bikini top like a course, oh myini like this is what everybody wears in the summer. Guys, what are you doing?
Speaker 1:come on, get on it. Oh, you know what's worse than a Coors bathing?
Speaker 2:suit a natty ice. I think they both exist.
Speaker 1:I don't know yeah, get that bikini. Throw on a fake, you know you could rub it off later a tramp stamp that says america above your bikini. Just really go for it.
Speaker 2:I don't own any of these things. I'm a terrible american, so I need I need to prime day all these if, if any of our listeners do, though, we're totally, it's cool.
Speaker 1:Still, it's totally cool. We're not making fun of we're totally, it's cool.
Speaker 2:Still, it's totally cool.
Speaker 1:We're not making fun of you, we just want, yeah, someone's listening to this with their natty ice bikini on America tramp stamp Like what the fuck? I don't hate it. I don't hate it either.
Speaker 2:Right, let's talk about our next topic, okay, so recently, sarah Jessica Parker said in an interview um, basically, I'm just paraphrasing that women leads cannot be antiheroes. They have to be very likable. So, kind of just looking back, um, you know, back in like 2018, we saw the rise of the female anti-heroine with things like killing Eve. She was a big one. Um, she's definitely an anti-hero, she's tough to love, um, but they're basically, you know, can women be anti-heroines and actually be liked Um heroines and actually be liked? Um, so when a girl's unlikable, a girl is a problem, uh. Quote by roxane gay and her 2014 essay um, bad feminist.
Speaker 2:So, yes, I would say for a long time, to be a successful character, archetype in mainstream media, women had to be obviously beautiful, sometimes funny, but not that essential, and you had to be likable. My best example always is Skylar in Breaking Bad, the wife. I don't know if you've seen Breaking Bad. Okay, the wife is just not likable. And she's not likable because she's kind of like a real person, where she's like where the fuck are you Like? Like her husband is making meth in the desert and she's like um, hey, like are you coming home? Like she basically is just like is kind of a normal human that you would not see before, that you wouldn't see that on screens because they always made wives very pleasant, very likable, and she wasn't. She was just like where the fuck are you? Why do you have a second cell phone? Why are you late for dinner? All of a sudden you know, like all these suspicions, that a normal person in life would be like I'm sorry, but what the fuck, like the jig is up. Tell me where you've been.
Speaker 2:She had a normal reaction and she's one of the I think she's been voted like the most hated character on tv, yeah, and when you watch it she does great on you. She's very unlikable. But at the same time she's not unlikable because she's not a good person. She's just again like kind of how a normal wife would probably react. And I think that rubbed guys wrong because for years it was like the guy could be whatever the worst fuck up, cheater, this, that and the other, and he would always come home to like a pretty pleasant wife who wouldn't ruffle feathers like that was the basic. Like sitcom mom and then you know, hbo mom and it really was like skylar who was, you'll see. I mean, you'll watch merce. Honestly, you should watch it. She's just not fucking likable. Um, and that kind of actually feeds more into the male anti-hero because you go, oh my god, he has to put up with her and you actually sympathize for him more, which is interesting. But as of late they say around 2017, 2018 we saw a massive rise like fleabag.
Speaker 1:You've seen fleabag the comedy no, but is it because I think around that time that's when maleficent came out and she's a great anti-hero, but because they give a backstory and you realize she's actually the good person the whole time?
Speaker 2:yeah, so not in that sense. I would say like in Fleabag, like it's a hilarious comedy, phoebe Waller-Bridge massive. Like literally one of the best commercially successful female written sitcoms. Like it's on prime. It's only two seasons, six episodes total. It's or six episodes each. It's such an easy watch. Um, she is, like you know, classic like train wreck. Like she's classic like drinks a bit too much, makes mistakes, falls in love with a hot priest, like you know. Um, it's just like that funny, like flawed woman and until her, and maybe maleficent and train wreck that movie. Um, obviously killing eve. She's literally an assassin. Until that rise of these women, it it was not okay to be disliked like you would end up as a skylar who is globally hated. I've actually never spoken to someone who likes skylar men or women. Yeah, wow, that's actually I know, but now, but breaking bad came out. I think the first season was like 2009, it's a long time ago.
Speaker 1:Oh, the senior in high school yeah and well, depending on if it was fall, then I was the world was just a different place and it was like, oh, fuck that bitch.
Speaker 2:Like people oh, my god, if you like, go on like a subreddit of oh people like are like fuck that bitch, we hate her so much, hope she dies. Um, yeah, she's a character guy, I know, I know, but that's how much like it was just so abnormal to be like she's so unpleasant on screen but yeah, but now it is kind of okay. But Sarah Jessica Parker says it's not and that she doesn't think female anti-heroes get the same love and praise that male anti-heroes do. Totally, who's one of the most beloved characters of all time? Tony Soprano. He's a sociopath. Yeah, he cheats on his wife religiously, kills people in cold blood. Is very should be, by all intents and purposes, should be very unlikable.
Speaker 1:Is beloved, yeah, yeah he's not even good looking, is that? I mean? I think it also kind of stems into gender roles. You know, yeah, no, definitely like people meant to be this rugged, rough, tough, bad guy and girls are supposed to just be there. We're just the supporting character. We're supposed to be there to love, support, love you, no matter what kind of psychopath you are. That's just our roles.
Speaker 2:And that role of nurturing, actually as the woman, goes back way further than you think. I'm not going to say tribal times, because that's just simply not true. You had to be just as tough as a guy, although, yeah, you had to take care of a baby because you had milk and there was no formula. Back then the only way the baby could live is on your titty. But in the Puritan I want to say 15th century, up through modern time it was priests would say that the woman was the what is the word I'm going to look for spirituality of the house that women were too fragile and dainty and they had to stay home and raise the children because they brought spirituality. So now, if your husband goes out and cheats on you or doesn't go to church, isn't living up to the Puritan beliefs or Protestant beliefs, christian beliefs in general, he can repent and that's okay. But the woman is what she teaches her children's spirituality. So she has to be the best. She has to be pure. She has to be a virgin when you meet her. He doesn't have to be. So she has to be the best. She has to be pure. She has to be a virgin when you meet her. He doesn't have to be, but she has to be. She has to be chaste and holy god-fearing um goes to church every sunday and then also a member of bible study. So she's in church all the time.
Speaker 2:Because they thought that it was her job to be home with the children all the time and they could only learn to be good through her, which obviously is not true. Your children learn by watching everyone who has a role in their life, so both parents, if both parents live in that household, both parents are equally influencing them. Even if dad is not present, they have this. His lack of presence influences just as much as his presence, um, but obviously, how could they know that at the time? But that is what set up the timeline that now we're stuck with now, whereas women have to be good because in it we're so pro we can't even explain. We're so far removed from this. We don't even know why women have to be good. It's subconscious belief, but it stems from, uh, religious teaching yeah, I don't doubt that, and it was able.
Speaker 1:They were able to get away with it for so long because when you really restrict how you know high a girl can go in school and then you'll marry them off between 12 and you know whatever I mean. They're so young, they're uneducated. You do that after generation after generation. What are they? They don't know any different. They had no social.
Speaker 2:There were no rights as well. You were, um. When you got married, you became your husband's property. So he was legally allowed to beat the living crap out of you as long as um, this is true, as long as the stick he hit you with was, uh, fatter than his finger, um, so he, he, you were his property. So he had property rights over you like he would his house, meaning you could never own the house, you couldn't. The money was never yours, um, basically, everything he touched was his. Everything you had inherited before marriage is automatically his now, not joint, it's his once you get married. Get married, um, so it was just a very different time. So it wasn't like, oh, you had no way out. You legally couldn't get out. Your husband had to die. You could, you had to be a widow.
Speaker 2:Women used to pray that their husbands would die I, I don't get that, I really don't because then if you were a widow, at least it wasn't, divorce was illegal, so it was like you weren't living illegally, um, and you were free.
Speaker 2:You would like be like thank God, my husband. I mean, how sad is that, um, but yeah, so it's very interesting that we have this whole subconscious belief that women have to be good and beautiful enough, at least when men can be the. I mean, the classic american sitcom is like a kevin james type heavy, not attractive, but funny, with the leah ramini who's an absolute knockout obviously I'm talking about king of queens like and that was the the, you know play by play of every american sitcom for decades before and decades after. And we, until modern day, we were not like, wait a second, how the fuck would kevin james land leah ramini? Because men wrote the shows, yeah, pretty much like they never were like, wait a second, this girl, who's way hotter than him, way smarter, would never fall for him. They were just like well, he's funny, it's like so listen, they were getting away with it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they were and I do love like fleabag is. I can't believe you haven't watched. It was such a hit 2018. Girl like that was like all everyone talked about girl 2018.
Speaker 1:I was.
Speaker 2:Who knows what I was doing it was like one of the even mom has seen it. It's like one of the biggest commercial successes, like she's won every award for it and she wrote it herself it is so it's based on her one woman show and then they turned it into two seasons on prime. It is so funny you should watch it. Um, definitely, yeah, definitely, it was everywhere. Um, but it's, it is like I love it because it finally ushered in the new um era of like you could have a female written show, mostly female cast, and guess what? It doesn't have to be that classic like oh, I'm an assassin and I'm funny and I beer and a hot dog like she.
Speaker 2:They literally have an episode where her sister gets a bad haircut and they have like the worst day ever and it's like yeah, no, like I'm sorry, like that's what girls like. They go, they rush into the salon and they go hair is everything and it's like you know this is not written by a man, because a man would be like that's not true, I'm sorry. If you get a fucking bad haircut, you best believe you are going home and sobbing no, like we're not guys, we can't just fucking buzz it and go. Oh well, it'll grow back in like it is one of the most like, just like episode. You just identify with it, you totally get it and you go. Thank god, what a breath of fresh air that women can write shit for women, unashamed, I'm sorry. Why does every single woman right have to be like she's a sexy badass? She doesn't play by the rules, like can we stop being pick me's and just be girls, girls?
Speaker 2:they're always in like these tight leather outfits, like the superheroes, it's so unrelatable and unrealistic and like where there shouldn't be shame in writing content for women. Why do we have to be like? I'm just like a guy like you. You don't have to be, you can write what is funny to women. And one of my biggest pet peeves is watching a show um, female dominated or even female standup. I'm laughing, I'm loving it.
Speaker 2:And if you're with a guy and they go, it's not funny. No, it's not funny to you, because you don't have a vagina, you don't have your period, you've never had a baby, anyone with any of these things or who slept with the guy. You know, you get it. It's funny to you and you can't just say well, men, male comics are always funny. No, their comedy is funny to you, you have a penis and you've slept with women and it's just a different sense of humor and it drives me crazy. She's not funny. Well, 50 of the population is women, so at least half of us find this money yeah, I think for so long, like you said, because it's been male dominated.
Speaker 1:They're not really like, they're just getting used to, you know, being like. Oh, so we can have different viewpoints and it's yes like they're just not anything written by a male was the status quo?
Speaker 2:it's not, this is male comic, he's a comic, she's a female comic, but he's a comic, whereas up until seriously, a couple years ago, it was like no, no, no, if you're gonna identify by gender, then he's a comic, whereas up until seriously a couple years ago, it was like no, no, no, if you're gonna identify by gender, then he's a male comic. You know, and it was just the status quo. Shows were funny because they were written by men, they were directed this way and they started these people because men chose them. Um, and that is what drove american globally, what we found funny, what we found to be appropriate for TV. And finally, women were like no, you know, we can actually like wrangle half the population right now.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, so I'm glad it's changing.
Speaker 2:Thank God. I actually just watched. I'm going to recommend it. It was, um, filth queen standup. It just came out two weeks ago on Netflix. I've never seen her, but I've seen her in something before, but I've never seen her stand up.
Speaker 2:She's very popular in Canada Cause she's a comedy podcast, um, and I was like, oh, I don't know, like cause filth queen? So sometimes I'm not like into the whole, like fart humor et cetera, whatever. Let me tell you, marissa, when I was actually laughing out loud I was home alone, I was laughing out loud. I had like stifle my laughter at some points. I was like I can't believe I like this, like she is hilarious, but like it's a no holds barred, like I'm a woman and this is what we go through and either you like it or you don't. She was fucking hilarious.
Speaker 2:Filth Queen guys on Netflix, very new, check it out. It might not be for you because, like I said, it's called Filth Queen. So if that's not your vibe, that's not your vibe, but I found like all her content so relatable, even like the fart stuff she talks about. Because guys fart humor, they're like, so I let it rip and you're like, okay, like she's talking about she's going to like um a hinge date, like she's going to meet him at his house and obviously fuck, and she's like I let one sneak out in the car, gotta know what it smells like if it's. If it's not smelly, we're gonna get away with it, and I'm like that is so funny. Like she's like testing the waters of her own gas, because she's like if we're having sex and one slips out and it definitely doesn't smell, we got away with it. Um, but I was just like this girl is so funny. Um, but yeah, I do like that. Finally, it's like you could be unashamed to be doing female humor for women.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, good, I'll have to give it a look, give it a look out. I think that's why I really liked allie long, because she was very dirty and filthy and descriptive with motherhood and birth and doing things with now her now ex-husband at the time was her husband and I just I liked it because, yeah, they expect women to just be so dainty and funny but in like a light hearted haha way and she was just like nah, fuck it.
Speaker 2:And if you go on any of her, like anyone who comments on her on reddit etc. People will ream her. They go okay. Another special about how much you hate your kids. Maybe you don't have kids, but how come men can tell story after story about hating their wives, hating their girlfriends, their dicks. So many dick jokes. Why are we not like, okay, you shouldn't have had kids then, but because she's a mom, she's not allowed also, people forget especially.
Speaker 1:I really hate when the pick me women say things like that too because, like you, if you're a mother, you should know that it just because you feel this way about your kids, that's not the whole story. You're a human. Maybe your kids are annoying the fuck out of you. That day, like you're allowed to hate them, you still love them, but like in that moment, that behavior you hate that behavior Also.
Speaker 2:Wait, sorry, guys, dose of your own medicine when male comics make a horrifically misogynistic joke and they go, it's just a joke. Same goes for Ali Wong. Motherfuckers, it's just a joke. She's a comedian. She's literally paid to make these jokes. She doesn't actually want to kill her children. Guys, use common sense.
Speaker 1:Obviously. Also, it's just like I don't. I feel like it really hurts the progress forward when you make a woman feel bad for something like that, because that's reality for a lot of mothers, especially with postpartum depression and everything like venting and you know go into shows like that where you can connect and say me too feels really good and it makes you feel not alone.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's that connection, it's that endorphin release, that serotonin, that oxytocin, knowing like oh, so you're supposed to sometimes just want to like, punch a window, awesome, okay. Now it's now that I know my rage is totally justified. I'm not going to go home and Google my symptoms and freak out.
Speaker 1:Right, right, because then then we're just isolated and it's all hush hush and we feel bad about it, like shame. Why should we feel shame? That's not the point.
Speaker 2:You're on the the roller coaster of your life for approximately 10 years. I'm pretty sure you're going to be like spinning out. Jerry says longer, yeah. Then they turn into teenagers.
Speaker 1:Yeah, sorry.
Speaker 2:So crazy. I always say, like, why did we sign up for this?
Speaker 1:This is so insane. Don't? I don't know.
Speaker 2:I know I forced you into it join me in hell it's like, it's like silly, like I can't even describe, like.
Speaker 1:It's insane, like you've never loved something so much, but at the same time, you've also never you've never loved something so much, but at the same time, you've also never hated everything that comes with it. You're like why and like. I can't even explain it Like I would. I would throw myself in front of a bullet or a car for my kids, but don't ask me to share my snacks. Stop singing the same song on repeat and stop saying Viking and sound like fucking in a store.
Speaker 2:I would die for my kid. But don't ask me to explain why. That's how I always say. I can't explain why, because sometimes I actually want to punch him. I don't, but sometimes I'm like you could use a swift little punchy punch just to just to go to bed. Just to go to bed. Um. Yet I would be like strung and quartered for him. Don't know why.
Speaker 1:He's kind of a prick sometimes, but I love the moms that are like, if you disagree with this, you don't spend enough time with your kids. Because it's so true, because if you spent enough time, you I was- begging to send him to full-time daycare yesterday, like we can't afford it.
Speaker 2:But I was like I just want to be. I was like on a rant. I was like ted, you don't understand, I'm not built for this. I want to be acare mom. I want to go back to work and I want him to be in daycare full time. I want to be a part time mommy.
Speaker 1:That's why I sent my kids to camp. They told me okay. So I had a day where, like I actually have nothing to do except like back end stuff. But I could have kept her home, spill the beans. You want me to tell her she could stay home because you have no work? I looked, he knew what I was saying. Without even saying a word, I gave him that look like you say that. I was like nope, mommy has work today. When we sent her and then john was like oh, don't you feel bad, though? I'm like no, and you don't feel bad because you're going to work in office, bitch no, like, if you were the one doing it, you would be like no, no, no.
Speaker 2:Like ted's always like I don't want to leave you guys and I'm like swap swap.
Speaker 1:I'm dr melton too.
Speaker 1:Tag me in bitch like it is just, it's crazy it's, it's too hard and you know what jerry's gonna love this she loves when she gets a little gems. When I was a kid I would really get upset that she would send us to camp, knowing that I because there was times where I didn't love all the camps Like I love Camp Lohican but like the other ones in the area I wasn't really a fan of and you know, as a mother I get it. First of all she was running a business. She could not watch us, she did not want us getting into trouble.
Speaker 2:We didn't have a pool.
Speaker 1:She said all the time she felt guilty because she was like we don't have a backyard, you would rot in the house, right, right that, and like now as a mother and like mental health and sanity wise, like she probably did it for her own and to get shit done because, like, who the fuck wants to run a business and run your?
Speaker 2:kids. I don't know if she could have actually like the level she was working and three kids. I don't think it would have been possible to juggle.
Speaker 1:I think, knowing Jerry, she would have done it if she had to, but it would not have been pretty.
Speaker 2:I mean no like she said she's like you would have just stayed inside and wasted away and like what kind of childhood is that? Like we would have looked back and they're like we had no fun. And she said she's like I felt guilty, like if we had a gorgeous backyard and neighbors and pool. Like then I mean I guess, yeah, you could have stayed home a bit, but like we just didn't have that yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:No, I don't blame her now. When I was a child, I was like murder my mother, she hates me, but now I'm like girl oh, I love the sign with it. I was not that well, I was an inside kid, which is why I don't want to keep my kids home, because if I do, I'm yeah yeah they're gonna watch tv hours a day because they asked me to go outside.
Speaker 1:I go outside for five minutes. If one bug lands near me, I'm done, I'm done, I'm so done. I hate the outdoors and I hate if it's too hot that I'm sweating while sitting there. No, you're so funny. Done so, like you know. I mean, like I don't want my kids to be like. All we did was watch TV again for number 12 days.
Speaker 2:They have too much energy. Yeah, it's not good.
Speaker 1:Yes, so you know what they might hate me, but you know what I'm doing them a favor. They get to be outside all day with different friends and he, jack, even said recently after the 4th of July, more kids from school.
Speaker 2:So, like I have no friends, like you should have different groups of friends, because you're not, you're going to fall out with certain kids, you will. You're not going to get along with everyone. So it's good to be like you know what? I have friends from a different town and I have you know that to look forward to.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I yeah. So I mean I don't regret my choice about lying to my daughter today, and everyone in the thick of it understands why I did and I don't regret it, I do not feel bad?
Speaker 2:yeah, no, definitely not we're just.
Speaker 2:We're just like staring into the abyss, like wish that was me I know I'm trying to and I know every parent out there will get it, especially if your kids are older. You're gonna be like oh, I know I am trying to do that thing where I'm living in the moment and acknowledging that it is bittersweet. He'll never be this young again, and you know. So I'm trying to just be like I can never get this time back and I'm actually very fortunate that I can be here with him while he's this young.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so you're gas. Oh my god, I'm kidding, no no, it's true.
Speaker 2:It is true. It's not like gaslighting in a bad way, like it's good. I'm gonna look back when I'm 70 and be like, oh, it was nice.
Speaker 1:Maybe yeah, yeah although I forget where we were, it was a lot, it was definitely within six months. Um, that was something that was said where it was like oh, you'll miss this or whatever when they're teenagers. And then some teenage mom stepped in and was like oh no, gets worse in different ways. And then I looked at john and I'm like fucking hey, when does this ever never?
Speaker 2:um, guys, I'm gonna be in the us in august, so merce and I'll be recording together. She is popping, I can't wait.
Speaker 1:I can't wait. She's going to be here for a month. Guys, we stole her back.
Speaker 2:We're going to have our. What was that boozy brand called that? We had all the time.
Speaker 1:Oh wait, why are you? Why is it drawing a blank Cause? Yeah, wow, what was it called? Ah, yeah it.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that little one they know, shoot gosh used to plug it I know, but every time I was drunk, so that's a great plug for it. Guys, you will get wasted on these. Yeah, you will think of it.
Speaker 1:We'll tell you again now yeah, we'll, yeah, it'll come back to our mom brains, like it's all coming back to me now like buy the glass. Oh, you know what?
Speaker 2:buy the glass was just what I needed. See, I I knew I was like, yes, oh my god, ladies, yeah, on the rocks. Margies, margies and more margies, let's go I can't wait.
Speaker 1:Anyway, it's been a great episode, yeah thank you, guys.
Speaker 2:So much psychotic pussy and off duty a mom's receipt. Please, guys, if you have any questions, reach out to us. Let us know what you did for the fourth of j July and let us know about CRISPR technology and gene editing. Tell us what you think.
Speaker 1:Yeah, alrighty, take care. Bye baby.