Psychotic P***y Podcast

Redefining Success: Embracing Work-Life Balance in the Remote Work Era

• Dr. Bridget Melton, MD and Licensed Therapist Marissa Volinsky, MS, LPC, NCC • Season 1 • Episode 5

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Ever wondered how the freedom of remote work might redefine your productivity and personal happiness? That's exactly what we're unpacking today. We will take you on a journey through the landscapes of modern professional life, where work-from-home has shifted from a novelty to a necessity for many. We share our personal experiences with the flexibility that allows us to manage family commitments and enhance well-being. Bridget brings a fresh perspective from the healthcare sector, delving into the evolution and recent shifts in telemedicine, providing an eye-opening look at remote work's role in this critical field.

Family emergencies, impromptu school plays—life's full of surprises, and we're here to discuss the value of a workplace culture built on understanding and flexibility. We compare notes on how professionals across the UK and US are redefining success, often trading off higher salaries for reduced hours and a richer life outside the office. Work-life balance isn't just a buzzword; it's a blueprint for mental well-being, and we share stories that highlight its profound impact on our lives. Plus, we celebrate the technological advances that have democratized the workforce, empowering caregivers and individuals with disabilities to thrive in remote roles.

Towards the end of this episode, we get personal about the impressions left upon us by a workaholic parent and how that shaped our approach to setting boundaries between our careers and personal lives. We talk about the hustle of starting a business, navigating the learning curve to achieve harmony, and how life milestones—like becoming a parent—shift our priorities. Whether you're a seasoned remote worker or just dipping your toes into these waters, our discussion offers insights and reflections on making your professional life support the personal, with a nod to the enduring value of flexibility post-pandemic. Join us for a candid exploration of making work, work for you.

Disclaimer: This podcast represents the opinions of Dr. Bridget Melton, MD and licensed therapist Marissa Volinsky, MS, LPC, NCC. The contents of our podcast and website should not be taken as medical advice. The contents of our podcast and website are for general informational purposes only, and are not intended to diagnose, treat, prevent, or cure any condition or disease or substitute for medical advice. Always seek the advice of your physician, mental health professional, or other qualified health care provider with any questions you may have regarding a medical condition or treatment and before starting or discontinuing treatment.

If you or someone you know is experiencing suicidal thoughts or a crisis, please reach out immediately to the Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 800-273-8255 or text HOME to the Crisis Text Line at 741741. These services are free and confidential.

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Marissa:

Hello and welcome back to another episode where you're so happy to have you guys here with us. We are your hosts, marissa and Bridget, and today we're diving into a topic that's been reshaping the way we work the benefits of remote work. Over the past few years, since COVID, the traditional office setup has undergone a significant transformation. This has been the rise of remote work, accelerated by technological advancements and global events. This has revolutionized how we approach our professional lives. What was once considered a perk for a select few has now become mainstream option. So how do we all feel about this? We're going to dive into this and we're going to discuss this. So, with flexibility and freedom, let's talk a little bit about that.

Marissa:

Obviously, one of the best benefits of remote work is the flexibility it affords, especially if you have a family.

Marissa:

That's very important and it means a lot to you to be able to have that flexibility.

Marissa:

You know you're no longer bound by rigid office hours, commutes we all know that's hard, especially if you're commuting into a city and the employees can tailor their work schedules to suit their individual needs and preferences, and I think overall this increases life satisfaction. That's important for mental health, making your own schedule around your family and your needs, just really lets the ball be in your court and I think, overall, if you're happier, you also be a productive worker. So, whether it's starting your day later to accommodate personal commitments or you want to take a break throughout the day to recharge, remote work empowers individuals to take control of their time like never before, and it extends beyond scheduling. It allows you to create a personalized work environment that fosters productivity and creativity, which is important, so you can set up like a cozy home office or find inspiration at your local cafe. A lot of people love that, and you now have this freedom and we are now getting to choose things that we never have before in the workforce, and it's shaping it.

Bridget:

Yes, I love talking about this because I feel so left out of it, but I would just like to say we don't live to work. You work to live. At the end of the day, you might have a very meaningful and fulfilling career that you're proud of and kudos to you, but it is actually just a paycheck, like we work literally just to make money to afford things. So if that means you need to shift your hours, you need to start later or start earlier so you can finish earlier to make that work for your family. You should have a supportive work environment that allows you to be flexible like that, because it is just a paycheck, it's just a means to pay the bills, regardless of how important your career is.

Marissa:

that's why you have a job right like it's just to be a productive adult and pay bills absolutely I mean, in the end aren't we all just living on like a floating rock, like it's not that serious?

Bridget:

yeah. So if someone's like no, you have to do a nine to five or an eight to six. You have to be in the office why absolutely.

Marissa:

I think it's interesting in this podcast session because you have two people from different ends. Right, you have bridget's the doctor. It is definitely probably never going to be work from home with surgeries and everything. And then I'm a therapist that, although therapists do have in-person options, I have personally chosen for me and my personal life and my family to make a priority that I would like to work from home and which I have, since I've created my practice, and I'm grateful and thankful for that. I have that option. What I would love to know, bridget, since it's really kind of never been an option for you, how have you felt seeing the revolution of people get that option and you not?

Bridget:

Yeah. So I think it's great and I think I would actually thrive in a work from home environment. But I'll touch on that in a second. I'm so jealous. But I will say for people who don't work from home, if you have to go into the office, we totally appreciate others working from home because it stops all the commuter traffic. Usually Mondays and Fridays people choose like if you're in a hybrid work environment, they choose Mondays and Fridays to work from home for obvious reasons. And those days are great for people who do have to commute in, because the traffic is just reduced tenfold and it's nice and easy to drive. You're not so stressed. So a hybrid environment or a work from home actually benefits both parties, which is really important.

Bridget:

But unfortunately yeah, in my personal circumstances, I just can't work remotely, although I totally wish I could and I am like a self-starter. So I wake up, I get my stuff done. I rarely procrastinate. I mean I know we all do procrastinate because we're humans, but that's just not really my personality type. So overall I don't really struggle to find internal motivation to work from home. So it would be so ideal for me, it's just not my reality right now.

Bridget:

Unfortunately you have to go into the hospital to get things done. But since COVID, there have been openings for remote doctors, especially in family medicine. So general practice, family medicine, it's the same thing. So, over the past couple of months, though, I've been hearing some whispers that those job roles that were open in COVID and now have been open for four years are actually being taken away. So they're going to reduce these roles and try to bring people back into the office, which is unfortunate because of a lot of them, like, that has become their reality and they've made it work for them and their families.

Bridget:

Some of them are caretakers for their parents, children, et cetera, so it just it makes sense for them. It's really disappointing, actually, but, yeah, I've heard some whispers from multiple sources actually, that they are reducing those work from home roles. So it's usually like telemedicine you need a family doctor, you have a weird rash or something, you wake up, you book an appointment online and it's just over your smartphone. You basically FaceTime with the doctor so they can see what you're talking about and they diagnose you and they can send meds to your pharmacy if they need, which is really convenient for everyone involved. But, unfortunate, yeah, it's just so convenient, which one of the best things about remote medicine is seeking psychological help from the comfort of your own home.

Marissa:

Yes, absolutely, and that is unfortunate because obviously, like you said, they became accustomed to it. This is something that maybe they thought was a good long-term fit for them. I can't even imagine being in the position because for me I have gotten very comfortable. I have my routine, I have my schedule. I like that. I can make it around my kids' pickup and drop-off times and any extracurricular activities that they do. I can be present for even parent-teacher conferences, because sometimes those have really bad times and not everyone can make them. But now I can make it, so that I can always make it, and I can't imagine that being taken away from me. That feels a little rough there.

Bridget:

I know I feel like we finally like cracked the code to like being a working parent. It's like, well, if you work from home, then you actually can accomplish everything Absolutely. And now it's like why would we?

Marissa:

end it. Yes, I do see a divide, though.

Marissa:

I can UK, but in the US a lot of people that have investments in real estate, like the big corporate offices they are heavy push for everyone to go back in because their investments are in that building, they're tied up and they love to kind of say it's oh, it's because of work, culture and more productivity happens in the office. But personally I disagree, and there are people out there that may abuse it. Right, there's always going to be those few, but as a majority, I think it has been very helpful and it has great benefits and I think that it is the right direction we should go in as a society, and it said that there are some places that are taking it away.

Bridget:

I mean I would definitely say like it harps on the whole difference between, like UK, europe and US, because as far as I'm concerned here it has just enhanced the whole idea that you should have time for yourself and you should have that work-life balance, and hybrid working or working from home gives you that freedom. In the UK we have more paid time off in entry-level jobs. So my first year as a resident I had 29 days of PTO which I was like, are you sure? Like is this a mistake? Which it was inconceivable to me at the time. I was absolutely blown away. And it's not uncommon for people in the UK and Europe to have six to eight weeks PTO. Once you're like at a higher level, it's like my father-in-law has eight weeks. I think my mother-in-law has probably six to eight weeks as well. So taking time for yourself is it's expect here it's not, you know, like chastised and you're not judged for it. Like yeah, it's August, are you going away for August? Like the whole month? See you in September.

Bridget:

Emergency family time is also understood and respected here.

Bridget:

For example, your child care falls through the morning of, or your child develops a fever and you need to take them to the doctor here in the UK. You could call up the manager or your team early that morning, explain the situation and the fact that you need to tend to your child unexpectedly today. So you know, unfortunately you can't come into work and this will be totally excused and allowed because obviously your child comes before this job you have. So overall there's just a more flexible and understanding culture abroad than in the US and we understand things come up. Unfortunately you can't be in two places at once. So it's like if you have children or you care for your parents or someone, that is really your first priority, because who else is going to do it? You know you're a caretaker first, parent first, and then it's your job Absolutely. And I just feel like that that is not understood in the States and that's why a lot of people are like so obsessed with getting you back in the office because they want to take that flexibility away.

Marissa:

Absolutely. I have seen in my circle of friends and colleagues, because we prefer the work-life balance and the ability to make our own schedules from home, we are almost leaving the workforce in droves, Like to the point where it's like I even created my own private practice. I was like I'm not going back to work for X, Y and Z Not happening. So it's almost like when push comes to shove, we're going to get down to it, we're going to make it happen. Some people in my circle have even said they've taken pay cuts over going to the office.

Bridget:

They would rather be home and have more work-life balance, more family time and get paid less, than be paid an astronomical amount and have to go in the office and barely see their kids. Oh my God, same Wait. So here, if you're like a doctor in training or not in training, you don't have to be in residency anymore. I think you could be like at an attending consultant level. You can go. As of last year you could go less than full time, so it's not quite part time. You know you might be doing 80% of the normal hours or 60%. You get to choose. But you could go less than full time for no reason. Now you don't have to claim it's because you have children or you're a caretaker. It could be for any reason at all and it will be approved.

Bridget:

You take a pay cut, obviously. So you're, if you're working 80%, you're getting paid 80. You know, is it worth the hit to your wallet? And they all say yes. And they don't even have kids. They're like. It makes us feel so much better to just have that one day off a week, like a random Wednesday, to catch up on life, admin, laundry, you know. Maybe grab a meal with your friends, enjoy some sunshine on your face. It has made such a difference that none of them are going back full time, none of them are going back on, and they're all like why don't you do 8%? I'm like I'm not quite ready for that. I think I really need to squirrel my money away first and then eventually maybe do it. But I'm like, wow, not one of them regrets it, despite the pay cut.

Marissa:

In my circle. Not one has regretted it. They have been like this is the best decision I've ever made.

Bridget:

It's amazing what flexibility can do. It makes your brain feel so much lighter. You know, when you wake up, okay. So I rarely have work from home days Like literally right now I have like a work from home afternoon. So it happens maybe once in a blue moon for me, but I wake up feeling like so much lighter.

Bridget:

I'm like, okay, now I don't have to go to the gym first thing in the morning, you know the butt crack of dawn. I could go in the afternoon because I'm budgeting my own time this afternoon. Oh, I don't have to pack lunch with me because I'm going to come home and make myself a nice lunch and you know you don't have to plan your whole day in advance, whereas normally when I'm working in the hospital, wake up really early, go to the gym, pack my breakfast with me If I don't have time to eat it, pack my lunch with me, pack my snacks, cause I'm not getting home till maybe six at night, sometimes later if I'm about it. It's just like, well, I got everything I need for the whole day in my bag and I'm going to live like this, like a hobo out of my bag and go to work. It's just like when you have that breath of fresh air.

Bridget:

I'm like, oh, I'm going to be home at 1230 today. I get to work from home this afternoon. I'm like, oh my God, oh, I come home. I did some laundry, I worked, you know, I made myself lunch. God, it feels great to have that freedom and it's like I'm an adult. Why don't I always have that freedom? Why can't I always decide what I want to do?

Marissa:

also how I personally feel is we are not put on this earth to work ourselves to death. I'm sorry we get one life right, so like why can't I live it? Why can't I enjoy it? Why is majority of my life slaving away? I'm not subscribing to that anymore, I'm sorry. Unsubscribe, I refuse, I know, uh, I'm not subscribing to that anymore.

Bridget:

I'm sorry. Unsubscribe, I refuse. I know I'm not a creative, I'm not an artist or anything like that like a photographer, but if I was, oh my God, that must feel so good to have that complete freedom and knowing that you could travel wherever and take your work with you and just kind of budget your time however you want. That must feel so good.

Marissa:

I could talk a little bit on that, because obviously my board requires that whoever I'm seeing through telehealth must be in the state of New Jersey. But I do not have to be right. I could do it from anywhere, as long as it's a HIPAA compliant. You know, no one can have access to the room or hear my session, right. So that allows me to work from anywhere, and that is really amazing. It gives me a lot of freedom. I do feel lighter, I feel great. You're right, there is a lot of mental load that goes into worrying about the next day outfit, lunch, getting up for the gym, all of that, everything that your day entails. And to not have to do that, to just get up and be like, okay, I have to. I obviously I do that for the kids still, but once they're all dropped off and settled, I can just sit back and be like, ooh, deep breath. You know like I got this the rest of my day now, until my kids have to get picked up or is dictated by me and me alone.

Bridget:

Yeah, that is. That is amazing. That's kind of why my long-term goal is not to be a hospitalist doctor, like I don't want to do obstetrics and gynecology in a hospital, because then I can never dictate my own schedule. Even at, like, the top of my career, I'll still have, like a you know, a manager who's like you're in tomorrow.

Bridget:

So my long-term goal has always been to have my own clinic, because I want to dictate my hours, I want to make my own schedule, I want work to work for me. You know I don't want to be a slave to my job. Obviously I'll do anything for my patients and I'll make myself available to them, but I don't want to be a slave to the office. And that is always why, like, I found such peace of mind in knowing that my long-term career goals are to have my own clinic where I make my own hours. Maybe I'll do a couple of summer Fridays when the weather's good, you know, like I just I don't want to waste my life. And then, when I'm 50, I'm looking back and I'm like I I'm looking back and I'm like I spent so much time inside behind a desk working at a computer.

Marissa:

And for what Exactly? I think I could speak for the both of us that in our lives we have had role models that definitely kind of were empowered by working, and working really hard, right To protect yourself, set yourself up later in life, and there's nothing wrong with that, that is, it's smart, don't get me wrong. But unfortunately you're working your whole life, you're working like a slave, and then the company really invested in you and and I feel like there's less now like for employees to have loyalty to companies, if that makes sense yes, completely yes so you want me to do what older generations were doing, but for less?

Bridget:

no, I'm not a slave no, yes, it used to be like you stayed at a company for 40 years, you got the gold watch for retirement and you were happy and that company took care of you and that's why you took care of it. That's just not the reality anymore. You can give your life to a company for a few years and you're getting almost nothing back. Maybe you get a few extra PTO days like sprinkled in there, and they're like does that make you feel better? And you're like no, like I need more.

Bridget:

And that's why they're saying millennials and Gen Z job hop. We're going from one job to the next, not careers, but one company to the next. You know we're constantly in search of the company that's going to give us the better deal. And it's like and why wouldn't I, why wouldn't I? Want to be at the company that's going to pay me the best, give me the best time off, give me the best health benefits, flexibility, and maybe like cocktail hours once a week, like, why wouldn't I want that? Obviously, I need the company that is going to serve me, because I'm serving them and I'm giving you valuable hours of my life and my youth. Like I need something in return.

Marissa:

Absolutely. I need a retirement plan, 401k, health benefits and there's no loyalty because there's no loyalty to us. So, yes, I do have to do what's best for my family and I will job hop until I find a good fit and companies can get offended all they want. But if you want them to stop hopping, start offering more, start investing more into your employees and I promise you they'll stay. Stop offering random benefits like oh, you're upset, here's a pizza party. Yeah, okay, that's not helpful.

Bridget:

Yes, exactly. If you want to invest into your employees and your company, you need to give them the best opportunity to improve their own health and their own lives, and if you do that, you will form some loyalty and people will stick around until they figure that out. They got to spend money to make money. They're they're going to be turning over employees left and right, absolutely.

Marissa:

Trust me, employ will never leave. If you truly invest in them and you value and appreciate them and you give them the freedom to make their own schedules, I promise you they'll never leave. Yeah, they will feel appreciated. They will feel like they can dictate their own schedules. That family can come first, which is important, and I promise you they will never leave. Now, if they're leaving, you're doing something wrong.

Bridget:

You might want to relook at things. Yeah, so that actually brings me to my next little topic I want to bring up. So there is a study. I don't want to butcher these names, but it's from canada, so sama, sudram, hackney, young do, oakman, now ruzi, kia and yazdani in 2022. Club uh published research following the pandemic where they surveyed 1,617 people initially and then another 382 people for the follow-up interview six months later, and they demonstrated burnout, stress, general mental health and job insecurity levels all significantly decreased between the initial interview and the follow-up interview six months later. Sedentary behavior also reduced over time and a better sense of community with co-workers was reported over time. What was the difference in those six months working from home because of the pandemic?

Marissa:

there you go yeah.

Bridget:

So people working from home actually demonstrated better mental and physical health and so, odd, better community with co over time, and it's probably because everybody felt better. So everyone was feeling a bit more social and weren't just like let's get back to work, gary, you're like you feel better, you feel lighter and you're like you know what Actually, yeah, let's socialize, let's bond. So there is research out there to suggest that overall employee wellbeing does improve quite significantly in a working from home or hybrid environment.

Marissa:

Absolutely and for, say, with a time off right Getting requested. What really gets me is that there's people out there that can say at least once right that they worked for a company and their time off might've been denied.

Bridget:

Why is that?

Marissa:

Why is? Because to me that acts like you think you own them. I like to say, if I was ever doing that before, I had my own company. I'm not asking your permission. I'm telling you to prepare the others PTO, because I ain't going to be here, okay. So you know how many of these companies think that they could deny you because you don't own people and they're entitled to their PTO? It's part of their benefits package.

Bridget:

Yeah. So when you do residency, basically they tell you your leave should be approved if you give six weeks notice and it should be approved no matter what. So if there's a gap in that ROTA, that's up to the hospital to fill it. You need to hire a doctor, come in that day, pay them. They need to fill that gap.

Bridget:

And lately what we've been finding is that the managers will be like oh no, sorry, like two doctors already requested off that day and I'm like, yeah, but I'm asking over six weeks in advance. Usually I ask like 10 weeks in advance. Well, the second I find out I have a wedding. I'm like I'm requesting time off, you know, and they have been rejecting it. And recently it was only a few days ago, maybe last week this big study came out Surgical residents 9% of them reported clinical depression, diagnosed depression. I can't remember the rest of the stats, but a lot of them are on antidepressants, some of them are just in therapy alone.

Bridget:

And one of the recommendations was if I follow the rules and I request PTO six weeks in advance, like you say, you cannot deny it. That should be a thing now. It should be a blanket statement. I'm requesting it six weeks in advance. I'm telling you, when I have a wedding or a family commitment, a holiday or you know what F that I just want to go away. You should have to say yes and you have to fill that gap. That is literally your job. You are the manager here. Fill that gap. You have six weeks to do so, good luck.

Marissa:

Well, I love to say your inability to prepare doesn't constitute an emergency on my part.

Bridget:

Sorry, yes, why do I have to come in? Because you can't fill that gap.

Marissa:

Six weeks is giving them plenty of time to prepare. Don't kid yourself, that is enough time.

Bridget:

Yeah, reading the study really blew my mind. I was working nights last week and this kid I work with Zach. He showed it to me and I was like oh my God or no. Did I show him? I don't know, I was delirious, it was nights, I think. I showed him and I was like, oh my God, like this is absolutely harrowing the amount of surgical residents, trainees, who report depression, broken down relationships. Over 80% of them reported that this job has affected their intimate relationships, inability to keep a wife, husband, partner, etc. It's really shocking and it's all just because there is like no work life balance when you work in surgery. Unfortunately, it's just like you know if you're signing up for surgery to do like general surgery yeah, kiss your life goodbye.

Marissa:

It's sad because these are our frontline healthcare workers, right? What you guys do is amazing. You save lives and we need that, and if you keep burning people out, you think anyone's going to want to go into this career anymore. But we need it. We don't want to be at a place where we're lacking that. That would be a scary world.

Bridget:

Yeah, exactly, I think they are going to be hurting for more competitive specialties like surgery. So for a while it was like surgery was so hard to get a role, Everybody wanted a job in it, and this is in the past year. I think this is the first time they've actually seen the number of applicants fall because people are actively choosing themselves and their mental health and their romantic relationships and their youth over a career in surgery. So for the first time we're seeing a bit of a drop in applications and we think that it's not going to be as competitive as a specialty in the next few years.

Marissa:

That's really sad because obviously the career you're in is super important, it's super impactful and you change lives, you save lives, and things come up in the medical field all the time, right Like there's always new diseases, new things that you need to find cures for. So the last thing we need is less doctors and less people in this profession.

Bridget:

It's a shame we talk about it all the time. Burnout is like the biggest threat to doctors. So, like as we've previously discussed, like, your physical health improves when your mental health improves. So if you could reduce stress and burnout, we could reduce the physical manifestations of these illnesses. So changes in weight, lack of appetite, nausea, vomiting, heart racing, palpitations, you know, stress, ulcers and so on. When people experience the symptoms of burnout, they're more likely to describe frequent viral type illnesses like aches, pains, fevers, lethargy.

Bridget:

Burnout is associated with a higher risk of cardiovascular disease, type two diabetes, job dissatisfaction, increase of long-term sickness, absence and permanent work disability. That's from the national Institute of health. So you know, if you're experiencing burnout, it's affecting your mental health, it's affecting your physical health and now, because of your physical health is declining, you're taking long-term sickness leave or permanent work disability. It's so counterproductive. All because you're trying to work more hours. You're actually now disabled and you can't work and it just makes no sense. It's like the most vicious cycle, yet no one seems to know how to stop it and it's like nip it in the bud before you get to burnout level. People think that being a workaholic makes them more productive, but they actually are potentially taking years off of their lives and are definitely reducing the overall amount of time they can sustain productive work. So if you want to play the long game and you want like a healthy, happy career, you need work-life balance. This ensures a prolonged productive, fulfilling work life.

Marissa:

Yeah, just to touch a little bit on that, I feel like with workaholics and every you know all those kinds of terms that are related to that, throughout my life I've seen that that's kind of always praised right Like that's the goal, that's what they want. For me. I personally I feel like that has been what capitalism wants you to believe, because you know they need worker bees. But I just don't really believe in that anymore. I have had people tell me like, oh, you only work this amount of hours and they give me the whole vibe where they just think you know you could be doing more. You seem a little lazy to be a business owner, but I don't. They can think what they want of me.

Marissa:

My business is thriving, I'm thriving, my family's thriving. This is how I choose to live my life and it's sad that you don't. I'm sorry that you fell for that narrative that you had to work yourself into an early grave. That's really sad for you. That might work for you, but it does not work for me and I definitely do not intend to do that.

Bridget:

I completely endorse, like working, fulfilling work. But if your whole mindset is, I'm just going to slave away so I can retire a little bit early, which nowadays is still like 60, like your early retirement used to be like 50. Now nowadays is still like 60. Like your early retirement used to be like 50. Now it's like 60, 65. Like people aren't retiring before then but at the end of the day, like that's completely your, your decision, you're capable of making your own choices. But if that's your motivation, you're still going to be 60 or 65, then you're not going to be 30 again. You'll never get that back. You'll never get that youth back and you will regret not enjoying the tiny moments you can while you were younger.

Marissa:

Oh, absolutely. I mean, I've had people kind of disagree with the way that I view the world and similar to, obviously, what you and I are saying here, but I love to say, like everything that you're saying about, like, no, you need to work harder. I've literally proven to you because, in your mind, if I don't work hard enough, how could I have been an owner? Well, okay, well, I'm an owner, so all right. Well, then you won't be able to have employees, all right, I have employees now. Now, what? What? Now, what are you going to throw at me? Well, overall, it won't be successful, all right. Well, it's doing pretty dang good. I mean not not to jinx myself, but we're doing pretty good and my employees are satisfied and I communicate with them frequently. And's like they can keep throwing this stuff at me, but everything they say I disprove, like everything that you think happened if someone worked less. I am proving you wrong. So what do you have now? Please throw it at me.

Bridget:

Exactly, yeah, you just prove that there are many ways to get to the same outcome, many ways to skin a cat. You know, like you, you could still have a successful business and be an owner and have employees and still manage your time effectively however you want.

Marissa:

Yeah, absolutely. Also, I know what we were talking about earlier, about the companies and their office spaces and how they have real estate in that and their investments in that you know they could probably redirect these resources. You know, get rid of the office spaces, take all that and put it back into the employees, give them more benefits, and the employees also get to save on transportation, dining and professional attire. So they're saving money there too.

Bridget:

Oh, definitely. I think the savings to people working from home because you're not commuting, maybe buying lunch out in the city, et cetera, is astronomical. That's why I'm really jealous of you guys.

Marissa:

Oh boy. Also, when I did back in the day, when I worked for a big company for mental health, let me tell you, I promise you I'm more productive now because I would just walk I was the person that walked around the office and just chatted. I was that person because I was like screw it, because either I was the person who did all my work already and I was bored Cause I I mean, I was like I can prove to you I don't need eight hours to do my work. This is ridiculous or I knew, because it didn't take eight hours, I would save it to like the last few hours of the workday, so the whole beginning of the workday. I would just be like this is a social outing, this is great. So it's like. It's like I still got, but no one ever caught me or had issues with me because I still did my work and I did it on time and it was good.

Bridget:

It wasn't you know bad work. It was great work, but in the future I'm going to have more time with my colleagues and my own children.

Marissa:

Is that not sad? Like your family's, your legacy and what you pour into it is so important.

Bridget:

Yeah, we. So. We, Marissa and I, grew up with a very workaholic environment and I know people say workaholic all the time but like truly to fit the workaholic archetype, like not many people do, but I would say our mom does.

Marissa:

Yes, yes.

Bridget:

Yeah, like work at the expensive LLs.

Marissa:

I will preface this by saying there is nothing wrong with that and I truly believe she does. If she enjoys that and it brings her value and comfort, fine, because there are people out there, it's their personality type and they feel better by being productive, great, that's great. Only issue I have is when a lot of people try to force that down your throat because that's not going to work.

Bridget:

Yeah, definitely. But we saw like I mean again, it makes her happy but we saw the not so great sides of it, like I would say, when we were younger, like grade school age, I felt like my mom was like this woman who made the rules but had no better understanding of that. I know I don't know if that makes sense Like it was like I don't know, we had no closeness and it wasn't until I was in high school and she had many more employees and was finally able to, like, take a breath of fresh air. That it was like we developed a close relationship and it was like, I'm sorry, who are you Like? All of a sudden, you're coming to all of my events.

Marissa:

And she joined the pta, remember, and everyone was like, I'm sorry, you have a mom well, one of my favorite memories of our mom is what she would tell us um, we were like one of the last not the last, I won't give her that bad but like one of the last to get picked up from either dance or cheer practice. And we would call her and we would be like where are you?

Marissa:

practice ended 15 minutes ago and she'd be like I'm five minutes away, I'm already in the car, but you could hear that there was no car in the background and you knew she was in her office and we were like you haven't left the office yet and she was like no, I haven't never left.

Bridget:

Yeah, she was like I'm right around the corner. Never so many times after soccer practice I was left there alone and like one parent would always stay behind. Obviously they're not just gonna leave like a nine-year unattended, and they'd always stay back and be like Do you want me to call your mom's cell phone one more time? And I'd be like, no, it's okay, like you could go. And they're like, no, I'll wait with you, honey, jerry. 20 minutes late, 30 minutes late. And meanwhile this poor mom or dad is giving up their own time just waiting behind and I'm like I'm really sorry.

Marissa:

It's hard because, number one, she was in a profession which is very much you have to be present, you can't not be present. She opened it really before you could do like work from home, things like with the technological advances, so it wasn't even like it was available to her. So she also had to, like you said, she had to build her business up before she could fully take a step back and be involved in your stuff while you were in high school. So that is hard, you know. So I don't knock her for that. I understand that. It's not like she had a job where she could be like. Well, you know, family comes first and then eventually, she did try to make it right, but it is.

Marissa:

It's hard. It's hard and because we grew up in that environment, I think you and I are very pro work life balance, you know yeah first.

Bridget:

Yeah, definitely. I just don't ever want to. Like I feel like it stresses her out all the time. Guys like no joke, she is, she 61 and she will still work until two or three in the morning on her computer down in her office. Like that is a true obsession. I'm like please stop Go to bed.

Marissa:

Please go to bed.

Bridget:

Yeah, it's madness.

Marissa:

Madness, you could, you could. You will not catch me doing that. I'll let you know that right now, never.

Bridget:

Oh my God, no way. I value sleep, way too much.

Marissa:

Yeah, no, also, in the beginning she was heavily the reason. When I opened my practice she was like you're going to have to take anyone that you feel that you can help in the beginning, because until you get a full caseload you can't be picky choosy, which I do agree with. But in the beginning I was having someone come in on a Saturday, a weekend day, which I do not allow now, and I really wasn't happy with it. I felt, like you know, I was giving up some of my family time and also that this was heavily influenced by my mom and the way that she did her business and she felt like mine would be successful as well.

Marissa:

And once that client successfully discharged, I never offered it again because I sat back and I realized that really wasn't something that I did for me. It might've been a little bit of people pleasing and giving my mom what she wanted to hear versus what you know, thinking. Oh well, she ran successful business. She must be right, you know. But I took a step back and I was like you know what this doesn't really fit with my values and I'm no longer offering weekend sessions and you know, if clients need weekend sessions, I am more than willing to refer them to people that I know have the availability and can help them. But you know, my ideal client does not fit that narrative for me. I'm sorry.

Bridget:

Yeah, that's a good point. It's just kind of like developing and coming into your own and realizing what actually works for you. And you come to that through trial and error. And yeah, of course, when you're trying to build a business, at first it might feel like you're working like a dog. But as long as you know that this is not my forever and I'm not going to torture myself like this forever, it's just to build a business, then that's completely fine and that's just part of being an owner. As long as you eventually develop those healthy boundaries and you're like okay, I'm at a point in my life, actually, where I don't have to work like a dog. I still want to work really hard and provide for my family, but I also need to be the best version of myself and in order to do that I need some boundaries. I need a couple of hours Like I need to breathe.

Marissa:

No, absolutely. So it is something I've had to take a step back and think about and I just decided what was best for me and my family. A lot of those Saturdays, too, were spent like John got to take the kids somewhere fun just to get them out of the house so I could have a quiet session, and it just got sad. I felt like I was like I want to go, I want to go to the park, I want to go get ice cream, I want to go to the beach.

Bridget:

Oh my God, which park, the blue park.

Marissa:

Yes, obviously the blue park. It's a really great park in my neighborhood.

Bridget:

I want to go to the blue park. That's my impression of my nephew.

Marissa:

And you know they're making memories and you know my session would be me. I choose family every time.

Bridget:

That is very commendable, very nice yeah.

Marissa:

Not everyone agrees with that, of course. Everyone would see. Some people see this differently and some people think probably, well, she's messing up and that's fine, Like again, this isn't a one size fits all. We aren't saying, oh my God, you must have work-life balance. If you truly enjoy working and it gives you purpose, you do that.

Bridget:

All I'm asking is don't push that on other people. Let everyone choose what's best for them. Yeah, definitely, definitely. And maybe explore something new. Maybe because I used to. Definitely because of the way we were raised, I was like I would never have work-life balance, like I'm going to work, like I'm crazy to the bone. And then I became an adult and I was like, oh my God, wow, it's really mentally draining. Actually, I could use a day off or so.

Marissa:

Absolutely. I was able to do that whole workaholic lifestyle in my mid twenties, you know, without kids. I don't even think I had a mortgage until I was 28. So you know, I had a lot less going on, a lot less stress and bills and yeah sure, what else was I going to do? I didn't have to worry about kids or pets, so sure I was willing to do that work like a dog. But you know, my priorities change. They change.

Bridget:

Yeah, it has a lot to do with shifting priorities. Definitely, I always thought I would never take maternity leave. I don't know why. I just in my head, I was like, nope, I'll just maybe take that month off to recover physically. And then I'll just like I want to get back in the game. And now that I'm pregnant I'm like, oh no, no, no, I'm taking all the time allowed that I can have because it's time that you'll never get back to bond with your child. And I do have a very demanding job, and so does my husband. So you know, this child, unfortunately, will be in a lot of daycare. So you know like you have to seize that moment while you can, absolutely, absolutely and a little bit more.

Marissa:

On the whole working from home, it gives us access to global talent. Now you know, we can access talent without geographical barriers, and companies can recruit top talent from around the world. Now I think that's a great tool to have, and you want someone who's the best for that role, right? If it opens up the pool to more applicants, that's amazing.

Bridget:

Yeah, absolutely.

Marissa:

No, and also we touched on it a little bit with you know, taking care of family and putting family first. But there's also a part of the population that working from home is very helpful because maybe they have a disability, maybe they have caregiving responsibilities, so being flexible and making their own hours and maybe even being home with someone they're taking care of, that's very helpful.

Bridget:

And definitely with the globalization thing that's really common in medicine, like radiologists will be on call from different countries. And I think that is so incredible because with radiologists you are reading, you know, imaging, x-rays, mri, cts from anywhere in the world. So it's not uncommon for when I'm working on a night shift there will be radiologists from like New Zealand or India, on different time zones where they're reading those reports and reporting on them. I find that so interesting.

Marissa:

That is, they can get access to doctors or any whatever you're seeking right Like the best person for whatever you need. So for a doctor, say. Someone in your local area doesn't have the specific training that you know that suits their problem or their diagnoses, and now they could see an expert in that. That is really going to be helpful for them.

Bridget:

Yeah, and because of technology, really, you should be able to access that no matter where you are, and that is incredible and really revolutionizing medicine, I'd say, is. But that's more about just like technology and the ability to reach other people. It's pretty incredible.

Marissa:

Yeah, absolutely. Covid was not good for a lot of people, but I will say it did give us this whole like work from home movement and I am grateful for that at least. And for those who are taking it away from their employees, I really hope you reconsider because unless it's like again like my mom was a funeral director or Bridget who was a doctor, obviously they need they need to be in person for their roles. Other than that, you know, come on why. Why do people have to come in? That's ridiculous. If they're getting their work done and you can see that it's good work, it's in on time and there's never been an issue with this employee. Just cut the micromanaging. Please Just cut it out.

Bridget:

Yes, preach girl, just stop, let people live.

Marissa:

Let people live. I feel like I'm very happy with this movement. Obviously, it suits my lifestyle. I will not be giving it up ever You'll have to take me. Wow, people are like what is going on with this one, and obviously Bridget mentioned that she would love this route if it ever comes available to her in the future.

Bridget:

Yeah, I would love that. I don't foresee it for me with reproductive medicine, unfortunately, but that's okay, a girl could dream.

Marissa:

Right. So you could still definitely go off of work-life balance, though, where maybe you're only doing certain work days. If you own your own practice in the future, you know.

Bridget:

Oh yeah, definitely, Definitely, I've thought about that. Yeah, I would have to put some strict boundaries on myself, really, yeah.

Marissa:

To just Does Ted have to shackle you from going into the office? No, Bridget, no Stay home.

Bridget:

No, you know, like you. Just I don't know. I think you feel like you want to help as many people as possible in a short period of time. I'm kind of known for being very fast in the hospital. That's like all I'm known for. They're like she's really fast and I'm like, yes, because I want to efficiently help people as quickly as possible, and it's kind of hard to like not fall into that trap. I think of like you want to maximize your clinic hours, I guess, so that you can see as many patients as once. But I honestly my brain is fried sometimes after a work day and that's not helpful to me or my patients. So I think in the future, if I did have my own practice, I would really have to set some strict boundaries and make sure I don't completely overdo it.

Marissa:

And you have to remember you know, doing that and taking care of your mental health too makes you a better doctor, makes you more fully capable to show up a hundred percent.

Bridget:

Yeah, exactly.

Marissa:

So, like you said, it's a good dream for your future, like your, your end game, so it's good that that is an option for you eventually the very distant future, unfortunately say it well you know, but I think overall there's more in it than what we've discussed more information on working from home. What we've talked about is honestly a small blip of this whole movement, but these are definitely our thoughts and I'm glad you guys are listening in. We appreciate you guys, as always.

Bridget:

Yes, guys, thank you so much for listening in. Please like and subscribe and follow us. The handle is at psychoticpypodcast. That's where you can find us on YouTube and socials. So that's at psychotic P? Y podcast. Please let us know if there's anything specific you want to hear us talk about. We are so happy to answer questions and harp on comments and talk about topics that you want to, you know, hear about, because we're here to serve you guys, we're here to educate you guys and have fun conversations. So let us know and we'll mention it in our next episode.

Marissa:

Absolutely so. On that note, take care everybody Till next episode Bye bye.